If you want to be happy, set a goal that commands your thoughts, liberates your energy, and inspires your hopes.

I haven't been able to control my emotions as much as I would like as of lately - whether they be good, bad or different.

Just getting an unexpected coffee delivery and not fucking anything up at work today (so far) has put me in such a good mood I don't know what to do with my happiness. It's just bursting out of everywhere right now and all I can do is smile to myself and write on a page that no one reads...which kind of puts a downer on things if I think of it that way...

But if I just imagine this to be a dairy, rather than a book, I wouldn't want anyone to read it and therefore it maked everything okay again. I sometimes get confused as to whether I'm writing on this for people or for myself as an outlet.

I like to think that I don't need others to read this and sometimes I even fall for it, silly girl. But of course I would at least like to think there's someone, anyone out there who gives a crap as to what I'm thinking or doing or feeling.

Everyone responds as soon as you put something morose or depressing on fb - even some people who you think shouldn't be pressing 'like' on sad statuses...but fb is more for fun...just doing something to fill up the time. I would rather people actually look on here and read my ramblings...but what the hell am I saying, that I need an audience to all of my shit?

I guess so.

The worlds a stage I guess. And really, do our lives mean anything if we don't have people there watching it, participating in it, becoming key figures in it? What is the point of life if you don't leave your mark on something? On someone?

I'm still in my happy mood....my fingers seem to have a life of their own sometimes and they go off on tangents....my brian does that too...whole body really.

I don't wnat to make this too long but I feel the need to just keep writing, like an itch I can't scratch.

I want to start writing again, finish off all those stupid little stories I started when I was like 16. But I can't find the motivation. I don't feel....inspired? At work, when I've got the time and when I'm home, I don't have a computer to write on.

I'll try one day soon to start again. But for now, I'll just be happy and enjoy the day and the weather and life. Yes.